Seven Emotions in Anticipation of Match Day

 From the March 10, 2023 issue of the Transformational Times

Seven Emotions in Anticipation of Match Day 

Emma Lankey – Graduating Medical Student of MCW-Green Bay 

Along the way, I have learned to embrace my feelings (see #1-7), lean on my people, avoid comparisons, and celebrate the small things... 

 

There are seven days until Match Day. There are 7 Stages of Grief. There are a lot of people who think "seven" is a lucky number. There are allegedly seven minutes in Heaven. There are seven things Miley Cyrus hates about you. To add one more to the list, here are seven emotions I am feeling leading up to Match Day… 

 

 

1. Exhausted 

• It has been a long road. Medical school has been the hardest thing I have ever done. It has had darker days than any other season of my life. As a non-runner, this is the closest I’ll likely ever feel to finishing a marathon: exhausted and very proud of myself.  

 

• 15 pre-clinical science classes, 7 required clerkships, 38 class exams, 7 shelf exams, 2 8+ hour board exams, and well over 10,000 practice questions later, we’re here. We have done it.  

 

 

2. Energized  

• Last week was my last adult rotation. As a pediatric applicant with only pediatric rotations left, I am done with adults. Forever. I am also done with school exams. I feel so energized and so excited that medicine is now becoming about true learning, doing, teaching, and treating. I am at the point where I have my entire career ahead of me to make waves in the field and start to be the professional I’ve always dreamt of being. I cannot wait to get started.  

 

 

3. Terrified  

• I do not know how to be a doctor. While my medical school training has been incredible, and I feel I have learned 8 lifetimes worth of information since the beginning of my M1 year, I still feel an immense divide between the residents and myself. Imposter Syndrome is real, and in this moment, I know I will *hopefully* get there some day, but that feels extremely far away from today.  

 

 

4. Anxious  

• Where will I live next year?  

• Will I match?  

• Will I have hundreds of thousands of dollars of debt and no job?  

• Will I make friends at the next place I live? Will I find mentors?  

• Will my husband be happy in this new city while I am working 80 hours weekly?  

• What if I am not happy with my match results; will I be able to mask my emotions while “celebrating” with everyone? Will I be happy eventually?  

• Am I going to love being a pediatrician as much as I think I will?  

• How am I going to balance everything that is on the horizon? Somehow I’m reaching the finish line and I’m also only at the beginning of the race?  

 

 

5. Sorrowful 

• This chapter is quickly ending. I had the chance to rotate at the same hospital my younger brother works at as a nurse. Attendings who are my friend’s parents have been my teachers. I have made real connections with mentors and faculty and even my mail carrier. I have made an incredible group of friends who I have relied on (re: exhaustion and dark days in #1).  

 

• Regardless of my match results, there is not a pediatric residency program in Green Bay and thus I will soon be moving on to a new city with a new community and leaving my old one behind (assuming I match SOMEWHERE; see #4). It feels gloomy to approach this transition and likely have some of my best friends move across the country in the coming months.  

 

 

6. Relaxed 

• I have had an incredible opportunity to interview at several programs I would be thrilled to attend. Over half of my list was initially tied for that coveted first spot, meaning if I land anywhere in the top 50%, I will be happy and thrilled. Because of this, in anticipation of The Match, I feel relaxed that statistically I am likely to end up somewhere I will be happy with and enjoy.  

 

• Frankly, my mom asking me if I am feeling stressed every 36 hours has been one of the more stressful parts of the whole thing.  

 
 

 

7. Grateful  

• How lucky am I? Not only did I beat the odds and gain a spot in a US medical school, but I was able to attend one 24 miles down the road from my childhood home, allowing me frequent family dinners and support during the dark days (see #1). In that admission, I have been granted the opportunity to learn more than I knew was possible, both for myself and in the field. I have had the opportunity to rotate with incredible attendings and residents who have volunteered their time to teach me what they know about medicine. I have been, and will continue to, lucky enough to have patients trust me with their lives and their health.  

 

• Truly, there is no field like medicine and I feel so incredibly lucky to be able to be a small part of it. 

 

Along the way, I have learned to embrace my feelings (see #1-7), lean on my people, avoid comparisons, and celebrate the small things. 

 

A huge word of encouragement to those working toward this milestone, and a huge congratulations to everyone approaching it this season.  

 

There are seven days left, but who is counting?  

 

 

Emma Lankey is a graduating third-year medical student at the Medical College of Wisconsin – Green Bay campus. She is originally from Appleton, WI.  Prior to medical school, she trained and worked as a registered dietitian. She is applying for a pediatric residency position in this year’s match. In her free time, she enjoys cooking Half Baked Harvest recipes, reading Book of the Month Club novels, planning her upcoming wedding, and doing Peloton cycling classes.